Lord I felt so awful right now...

I felt so awful. There's so many things buried deep down in my heart. There are so many things which I want to change Lord, so many.

How I wished. I wished You would let me learn to put all my trust on You Lord..There are so many things which I doubt.

I am afraid, I appreciate at the same time, and I don't want to have it because I don't want to lose it.....